Welcome back conglomerates. Today I am going to discuss a topic that up until this week I thought I had mastered. I am referring to the art of not allowing other people, outside of myself, to steal my joy. This week I learned that despite how far I have come on my self love pursuit there are still things I need to keep working on.
This week was a trying week for me at a job I just started about 3 months ago. The trying part was not the requirements of the job or how I managed my time. The challenge for me was how I let other people’s behaviors effect me to the point that I lost my power. A situation occured that had me responding out of character. Instead of leaving it as what it was, I internalized it & allowed other people’s immoral behavior effect the way I processed, felt & how I went on about my day. I allowed people whose opinions mean very little to me outside of my work enviornment to effect my mood so badly that I could not sleep at night. It was not until right before I started writing this memoir that I realized that I let these people snatch my joy for a few days. When I allowed these people to take my joy I allowed them to have power over me.
As we go through our day & are stimulated by the things around us it is important that we maintain control of our emotions by not allowing anyone the liberty to effect them to the degree that I did this week. As women, we give many people & many situations power over us just by relinquishing our joy & happiness to the situations that are presented. We become unhappy when we have disagreements with people we maintain professional & personal relationships with. Many times instead of dealing with the situation as what it is, we fail to move past it by letting it keep us up at night, from eating, going to the gym, isolating ourselves or failing to engage in other self love regimes we have discovered gives us joy.
It is not realistic for me to promote turning your emotions off or ignoring behaviors that have hurt you or have caused harm. But to fester, replay the situation repeatedly & obsessing on how you should have handled things is not contributing to self care instead it does the exact opposite. It promotes someone to be the puppet master of your life without you intentionally promoting them. I never understood this when I was younger but I understand it so much better now. People can only do what you allow them to do. The way we can ensure people do not interrupt our peace is by making consious decisions to be mindful that all situations do not last forever. Although it does not always feel like it, we have complete control of how we react to the things that happen to us. We lose control when we are past the point of being rational. As women going places, we have to keep in mind that no one is worthy of our power & many of the situations we face daily truly are just beneath us & are not worth the energy. As I have said in previous memoirs, your time is valuable, it is billable & everyone is not entitled to it. Every minute you give someone else your joy based on something they have done to you, is a minute you have given away freely. Your time is valuable & so is your power. Your power is your super power & all people, situations or things do not warrant a reaction, especially not a continuous reaction. You are the creator of your story line. People & situations can only contribute to it based on how you allow them to. Regain your power. It is yours for the keeping. You have every right to keep it, store it & protect it.