Toot That Horn, Bae

In this empowerment age we have progressively gotten better at empowering others by sharing our testimonies, encouraging them to push forward & supporting their endeavors of success. However, we got so good at doing this for people (yay!) that we spend a lot of time waiting for people to do the same for us. But when they fail to do so, we end up feeling immensely disappointed & unsupported. Therefore, I am reminding you that it is totally ok to toot your own horn. Doing so does not diminish your humility instead, it empowers us to keep going even if no one acknowledges us.

The older I get, the more I realize that validation from anyone, regardless of how great it may make me feel, should not be needed. Sometimes we have to just keep sight of our vision & push forward. If I have learned one thing, people do not always agree or see the vision until it is put into fruition & reaps results. People are not known to walk by faith & to teach them can be harder than you intend it to. However, it is not your obligation to show them how. You simply owe it to yourself to keep living & keep striving. The people meant to support you will show up. Those who fail to, well… *shrug*

Imagine the degree of unhealthy relationships (sexual, professional, emotional) that could be dismissed if we stopped putting so much weight on what people say. I was a rebellious teenager. I often heard from other people the failures that my life would take— well, two masters degrees & a career later all that shenanigans does not matter. I thank the lord that I did not need anyone’s validation to define my abilities. Though I still struggle doing so, I have accepted that I can relish in my accomplishments before they happen, celebrate once they become a reality & share my testimony in a positive way. It is so hard to talk about ourselves in a positive light because we have been conditioned to do otherwise, however, it is our right to empower ourselves. Learn to accept & appreciate the encouragement from others when you receive it but understand that if it is not received, it is just apart of the process. The power is in what you believe.

After all, they did say, “empowered people, empower people“. They just never said we could not empower ourselves.

One thought on “Toot That Horn, Bae

  1. Yes yes yes. A guy I briefly dated had complimented me on something once (I forget what it was), and I responded in a “I know” kind of way. He immediately accused me of being conceited. I shut him down so fast. I said, “So I’m either conceited for knowing and acknowledging my own strengths, or I’m insecure and need your constant reassurance? There’s no in-between?” In retrospect, I think I intimidated him and it was his attempt to take me down a peg or two to a level he could be comfortable with. He had never dated a real grown woman before…

    The problem is that so many of us don’t believe in our own power. The best professional healers will tell you that all they’re doing is supporting you in learning how to heal yourself. In the last 2 years, I’ve learned to focus inward for the answers. I think of it as the piece of God that is within me. I pray, and then I shut up and go inward by meditating, to receive the insights. I get so many great ideas and so much clarity when I kill the mind chatter. Then, no matter what the people around me say, I am grounded in an internal knowing and trust of what the next right step is. The people who support us are vitally important, but the ones who don’t are also teachers. They test my resolve or challenge me to think more deeply about something.

    You also have to be careful who you share your dreams with. When a seed has been planted, and you have a big idea, a lot of people will tell you it can’t be done. You have to protect that seedling when it’s most young and vulnerable so it can be nurtured to grow, in your case, for example, into a website and blog! Once that dream grows strong enough, it can withstand the criticism and will defy what they know to be possible. You are still rebellious, dear, perhaps in a more enlightened way. 🌹 Besitos!

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